It's so interesting to read your own experience! I feel like bisexuals who are in hetero-presenting relationships (I am also married to a cishet male) feel like we have to compensate by looking bisexual in order to combat the fact we are constantly assumed straight. I personally feel like this overcompensation that is currently popular ("look as queer as possible to avoid being labeled straight!!!1!) ignores the internal work that needs to be done: accepting yourself as who you are without needing to prove it to anyone.

But, to be fair, I say this as someone who was often assumed to be a lesbian and absolutely revels in stereotypically "bi" style, especially because it helps me feel like I look more genderqueer. I have been mistaken for a boy on occasion, and that gives me "genderqueer glee" (I call it).

My hope is that someday popular society moves towards accepting bisexuals for who they are: girly, manly, nonbinary, and everything in between.